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Wikia DARP - Einar Faris today

Einar Faris today

This room, with its door deep in the bowels of the Department of Mysteries, has a tingling, conflicted atmosphere, even when its occupant isn't here to stir things up. Its oddly misshapen form was the result of an "Engorgio" charm cast in the Time Room by an employee who, most regrettably, had the hiccups. Its vaulted roof in the third segment is well beyond the reached of standard illumination techniques employed here, and the antechamber provides his bodyguards with unimpeded views of entrants. There is a certain arachnid element to its bloated, bulbous, contiguous segments, looking like a Bactrian camel with its legs taken out from under it.

There are tressle-tables set up and covered with parchments, maps and physical replicas and representations of countless possible scenarios and vital junctures in recent and potential future history.

Wikia DARP - Einar Faris' Office 01

Einar Faris' Office - main chamber

Einar Faris himself tends to flit from one table to the next, often carrying pieces or parchments with him, to place in some utterly new position, requiring a reassessment of the whole layout.

For those who care to look up long enough for their eyes to adjust, the inside of the cupola is inscribed, in a range of colours and lettering styles, with the motto "Small disasters cause panic. Panic causes large disasters."


Anyone invited to "the Tuit" by Einar should also come here, as this is "a round Tuit" - the place where you have to do all those things you said you'd do, "when I get around to it".

As the parchmentwork "pups", he is seriously contemplating adding another chamber. If he gets his way, the wall hangings may include whips and chains, with perhaps the odd 'branding iron' motif. He's also contemplating an "Adam West - Batman" style pole, or perhaps a tube, down from his flat.


Roleplay (By invitation only, otherwise, please leave a comment)

A dish served scrambled, as well as cold

Shaddap You Face - Joe Dolce03:12

Shaddap You Face - Joe Dolce

Einar has decided that the best revenge is to ruthlessly ridicule his enemies' musical heritage, and thus, beginning with the benighted example opposite, he will be laying a rotating series of audio traps for any WHPS who break into this office, and quite possibly anyone else who adequately annoys him.



Danny Kaye - Tschaikowsky (And Other Russians)00:55

Danny Kaye - Tschaikowsky (And Other Russians)

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